This month, we offer a few final words on the use of modifiers: Avoid nesting them in a single sentence and make sure to clarify their reach.

Here’s an example of a sentence containing a set of modifying phrases, each nested inside the next, taken from the pages of Richard C. Wydick’s Plain English for Lawyers, 5^th ed.:

Defendant, who was driving a flatbed truck that was laden with a tangle of old furniture some of which was not tied securely, stopped without warning.

Here is the same sentence with brackets and parentheses inserted to identify the relation of the various modifiers to each other:

Defendant {who was driving a flatbed truck [that was laden with a tangle of old furniture (some of which was not tied down securely)]} stopped without warning.

The sentence is difficult to understand because the reader has to mentally supply the brackets and parentheses to keep the modifiers straight.

The best remedy is to break the sentence up into two separate sentences:

Defendant was driving a flatbed truck that was laden with a tangle of furniture, some of which was not tied securely.  He stopped without warning.

Here’s an even more egregious example from Plain English of a sentence beset with nested, modifying phrases:

A claim for exemption, which in the case of a dwelling that is used for housing not more than a single family shall not exceed $300,000 or the fair market value, whichever is less, may be filed with the Administrator within 90 days after receipt of notice.

Here’s the same information, broken into two separate sentences:

A claim for exemptions may be filed with the Administrator within 90 days after receipt of notice.  The claim for a single-family dwelling cannot exceed $300,000, or the fair market value, whichever is less.

Failing to clarify the reach of a modifier can result in ambiguity.

Consider the sentence, Women and men over 30 cannot be admitted.

The sentence has two possible meanings:

1. All women cannot be admitted, and men over the age of 30 cannot be admitted.
2. Only women over the age of 30, and only men over the age of 30 cannot be admitted.

Often, this sort of ambiguity can be resolved by simply changing the word order, e.g.:

Men over 30 and women cannot be admitted. 

Other times, the reach of a modifier can be clarified by repeating words or making a list.

Ambiguous: red apples and pears 

Clear: red apples and red pears

Ambiguous: all vans, sport utility vehicles, autos, and trucks without four-wheel wheel drive      

Clear:  all vehicles without four-wheel drive, including vans, sports utility vehicles, autos, and trucks

In sum, don’t avoid modifiers altogether as they often add meaningful detail.

Just keep in mind a few rules and guidelines to stave off creating ambiguity and confusion through their use.

About the author:

Attorney Savannah Blackwell is a former news reporter who covered government and politics for more than a decade, mostly in San Francisco. She can be reached at savannah.blackwell@gmail.com. Follow her on Twitter at @SavannahBinSF.